i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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