1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
