Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
