Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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