You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
