yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Randomize
