I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Randomize