I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
