Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize
