Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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