lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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