just come out here and I will go home with you...
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
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