Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Randomize
