trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
two words: eviction party
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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