So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I'm too high and old for this...
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Randomize
