Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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