I don't usually arrange sex via text message
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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