remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
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