You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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