Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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