But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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