some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize
