I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Randomize
