You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize