Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Just high enough for therapy.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize