I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
