I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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