I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
