Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
