i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
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