i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize