You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize