oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
