Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I just want nice things and good sex
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
