READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
