I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
