So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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