omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Randomize
