: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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