How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
