I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize
