Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
We're too hungover to prance.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize