I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
