he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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