You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
