I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
even my farts smell like vagina
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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