you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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