he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize
