i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
