you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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