Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
